About a boy

I was surprised to find a message sent to my facebook the other day by a former student.  Let me tell you a little bit about him before I share the contents of the message.  This boy was the kid most of you go out of your way to avoid at the movie theatre, convenience store etc.  He is rude, disrespectful, loud and has a serious case of potty mouth.  I came to know him well in the three years I spent as a vice-principal and principal of the small rural school he attends.  Although I never taught him, he was a regular visitor to my office.  I got to know his mother well through our frequent conferences, meetings and telephone calls.  Because of him, I learned all about welding;  I had agreed to help him study the required safety test he had repeatedly failed in order that he could get into the welding shop and participate.  I worked on several English essays with him and he spent the better part of one semester in my office working on math in order to give his teacher a sanity break.  I arranged for him to attend summer school two years ago and facilitated online credit recovery last year.  He took up a lot of my administrative time.

Through our frequent interactions I was able to see the occasional glimpse of charm and a clever sense of humour but he masked it well.  Always at the point where I would think we were making progress, his attitude would creep in again and I would be ready to give up. Others felt the same way, in fact, this was a boy who made it easy for others to dislike him.  He was a bully, he was rude to teachers and to fellow students.  He was dishonest, he skipped school, never did homework, was disruptive and offered very little in terms of contribution to the school or the classroom.

I remember a particular day in my office last year; his mom was in tears, the school counselor was vibrating from frustration, his math teacher was ready to tear her hair out and he just wasn't getting it.  He said something like, "What's the big deal, why does everyone care if I fail? It's not your problem."   I responded by saying to him, "You are not going to fail, you are going to graduate. I am going to watch you walk across the stage and get that diploma if it kills me."

I accepted a job in the city last June and have not been back to my former school or the community.

Fast forward to Thursday when I opened that facebook message and read,

"Hey Mrs. Neiszner :) so I was trying my best to find you and I finally did.  I just wanted to invite you to my graduation!  I hope you get this in time and I hope you can make it...Yup, I did it and the grad is the 24th of June!"

Wow, I couldn't believe it on so many levels.  This is a major achievement and so many people own a piece of that diploma. That boy never would have succeeded without his teachers, administrators, school personnel, peers and family wrapping around and supporting him no matter what.  He didn't make it easy but no one gave up on him, despite how unpleasant he was to work with.  As a teacher, it is easy to help the students who want to be helped, or those who are disadvantaged in some way that you can empathize with, but kids like this boy are a challenge everyday.  I imagine that the rest of this year was no easy road for anyone but the fact is, the mountain was climbed!  He did it and now, because of this amazing support system, he has so many more opportunities than he would have otherwise.  This is a success!

So, I will be making a road trip Friday to fulfill a promise I made over a year ago, and it will be my pleasure!